After waiting all fucking day, putting off things we might have gotten done, it finally started raining around 11:00 last night and it has yet to stop. I just took the dogs outside. The yard is a swamp. Up the road from us, a lake has formed. I feel especially sorry for G who has to walk the quarter-mile to his bus stop in a few minutes. Thunder still rolls across the night sky.
I’m not sure how much sleep any of us got last night. Kat was up for most of it. G was up at 12 and 3, finally giving up around 5. I was able to at least stay in bed, dozing in and out. All the meds weren’t enough to induce sleep through all the pain. In a battle of arthritis vs. chemo, arthritis is definitely winning. Let’s set that pain level firmly at 10 and hope that it doesn’t go any higher. Tomorrow, it turns cold again. I feel like the weather has a personal vendetta against me.
We’re still 10-15 days from having any money in the account, assuming Social Security actually comes through. I don’t have any amount of faith in the system. We’re out of bread, margarine, and milk. I’m cutting back on coffee because that’s getting low as well. It’s not that we’re out of food, but that the food requires the addition of certain staples to be prepared and we don’t have the staples. The dogs will need food by the end of the week as well. This level of need is hurting almost as much as the arthritis. Right now, 10-15 days might as well be forever.
I feel really bad sending G out in the storm. If I still had a car I could at least take him to the bus stop. But no, not only can I do little to help myself, I can’t help anyone else, either. We’re hoping that Tipper’s bus shows up on time today. Yesterday, all the buses from her school were late because, get ready for this, the bus company didn’t know that school was starting back after spring break. How is that even possible? I’m sure they were given the same schedule as the rest of us.
Remember when things like this didn’t annoy us? We could play out in the rain and have a good time! Getting soaking wet was part of the fun. Now, I sit here still shivering from having taken the dogs out 30 minutes ago. This whole aging thing is for the birds.
I can take more meds again in an hour. At least I’m still alive, right?