The presidential primaries bring the circus of bad politics to Indiana for the next two weeks. Our best move is to stay home and have sex. Lots of sex.
Welcome to the real 2016. January 1 doesn't count; it's that in-between days when people my age and older worry about writing the wrong year on checks while our children and grandchildren stand by our sides asking, “What's a check?” January 1 is for parades and football and corned beef if you're in the Midwest, hog jowl or fat back if you're in the South. January 1 isn't a real day.